Top 20 Fatties and Trolls of Burlesque in Albuquerque

I’m an expert. Ok. This list isn’t biased at all.

Here we go in no particular order..

20. Adam Brown

adam brown

He’s not a burlesque dancer. He just wanted to be on the list.

 

19. Tony Travis

tony travis

Burlesque Noir’s choreographer. Sometimes he performs. Dude is such a troll he is straight up trying to drag a girl off the stage to take her to his cave to carve her to bits and wear her face like a mask.

 

18. Paige Star Savage

paige star savage

You don’t see Paige a lot. She is usually hiding under a bridge or cleaning up stuff. But she is there. Lurking.  Fun Fact: Paige only has eight fingers and toes and I have seen her eat a horse.

 

17. Riri SynCyr

riri

She’s the Mayor of Chubbytown for chrissakes. She bakes incredible snacks out of the blood of innocent children.

 

16. Kitty Irreverent

kitty

She’s done stuff in town. Something about the Southwest Burlesque Showcase and I think she scared Dita Von Teese once while at Burlesque Hall of Fame. Who cares. Titties.

 

15. Moe Pex

moe

I think he goes to the gym. I can’t really tell. He is the newest boylesker in Burlesque Noir and he will be making his stage debut this weekend. He’ll probably do a stupid push up or something.

14. Mickey Nuggets

mickey nuggets

Hoot hoot. Cluck cluck. The fresh, young and tender and full of trans-fats. Mickey Nuggets is another one of Burlesque Noir’s trolls. He is actually 1,000 years old.

 

13. Rex Starchild

rex broken glass photography

Oooooooh girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrl. Rex Starchild  of Burlesque Noir is everyone’s favorite dead boy. His performances are nothing but him rotting onstage and stinking up the place with his decaying stench.

 

12. Shelley Sequinz

shelley

Ladies and gents this is Shelley Sequinz of Burlesque Noir.  The rapper of the troupe in her birthday suit. She sings songs to lure men into her lair where she keeps them there as a pet.

 

11. Machina Tigre

machina

A member of Burlesque Noir’s elite fattie/troll travel team. I wrote you a poem Machina.

Fattie fattie fat

Please don’t eat my cat.

 

10.Lottie LaRouge

lottie

Newest member of Burlesque Noir. Something something tits something something. Lottie is probably really intelligent and looks like she would be amazing to have mind blowing conversations with. But who cares, tits.

 

9. Annie O’Roar

annie 

Annie O’Roar of Burlesque Noir has a nasty habit of stealing babies and seducing wives. She plays with snakes,magic, fringe and whiskey. Something something legs and tits.

 

8.Mischa Misschief

mischa

Mischa is apart of the fattie/troll Burlesque Noir travel team. A practicing Satanist , she frequently bathes in the blood of the innocents while consuming mass quantities of Jameson whiskey. That’s how she gets that healthy glow.

 

7. Joy Coy

joy

“Joy Coy is a member of Burlesque Noir. She often gives hauntingly beautiful performances of the classic theater style. “ Travel team member, Joy Coy is not allowed in the sunlight or else she will turn to stone.

 

6. Mary Jane Monroe

mary

“Mary Jane Monroe is another of Burlesque Noir’s standouts. On stage she is like a classic 1950s pin-up come to life. She pours her heart and soul into every second she is on stage and has a smile as wide as The Sandia’s. “ Another travel team member of Burlesque Noir. She carries rocks in her pockets so she can throw them at people.

 

5. Don Schrader

don schrader

I mean, come on.

 

4. Doutelle

doutelle

She’s not from Albuquerque but who gives a shit. She’s from Santa Fe with Zircus Erotique. She has an act where she is a troll ,which there are no pictures of. On that note, bitch has no bad pictures. You need to work on that.

3. Holly Rebelle

holly

Troll. Or a drag queen. Or an award winning soloist ,leader of an award winning troupe and co-producer of the Southwest Burlesque Festival. Hmm. Nope. Holly Rebelle is a troll.

2. General Blackery

cake troll mam'zelle hepzibah

Feed me your children.

1. This Bitch

fattietroll it’s a gif

A novel could be wrote about this bitch’s performances, but to keep it short here are the thee most important things you need to know:

Jesus. Christians. Glitter.

 

Be sure to catch most of these fatties and trolls at the Launchpad this SATURDAY NIGHT! Burlesque Noir Presents:DIVAS

divas

Starring Cora Vette from Denver, CO
Saturday, December 14th
Doors 8 pm
$10
Performances by:
The VaVaVettes (Denver, CO)
Holly Rebelle
Joy Coy
Mary Jane Monroe
Mickey Nuggets
General Blackery
Lottie LaRouge
Shelley Sequinz
Rex Starchild
Machina Tigre
Moe Pex
Mischa Misschief

Photos without watermarks are by Evil M West. Annie O’Roars photo by Trout Imagery. General Blackery photo by Mam’zelle Hepzibah.

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VEGAS BABY!

Quick post.

Image

I survived the Show Me Burlesque and Vaudeville Festival in St, Louis. Them fuckers can throw down and know how to put on a show.

Right now I am furiously packing to jet off to Las Vegas for my first ever Burlesque Hall of Fame. I’m super stocked and I’m going with the best friends/guides/muses a showgirl could ask for,  Kitty Irreverent and Holly Rebelle.

The best way to get a glimpse is to follow my twitters, Facebook and Instagram posts.

Oh look here they are!

Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/generalblackery

Facebook: http://wwww.facebook.com/generalblackery

Instagram: http://wwww.instagram.com/generalblackery

Lots of shady shit from Show Me was posted on instagram and facebook, so you know, get on that.

Here’s some hashtags too: #bhof13 #burlesquehall  #dirtyrottenshowgirls #shadyshit #whatwouldnomimalonedo #bestworstbehavior

I’m sure there will be others.

Stayed tuned for upcoming events in June. More classes.More shows. More cars. More hoes.

The Bawdy Beggars Roadshow and Holly Rebelle’s Birthday Bash!

So this weekend is HUGE!

beggars road show

Check it, I’ll be performing this Friday night at the Launchpad for the Bawdy Beggar’s Roadshow from St. Louis.

This is one amazing line up of super talented performers:

Lola Van Ella
Sammich the Tramp
Ray Gunn
The Hoochie Coochie Girls

With Special Guests:

Riri SynCyr
Intoxi Kate
Burlesque Noir
Kitty Irreverent
Austin Tacious
and Chicago, IL’s Mr. Junior.
MC – Devin D O’Leary
Amazing man of mystery, DJ Brian Botkiller!
DOORS at 8pm,
Show at 9pm
21+
$15 at the door!

Fuck this Friday is not to be missed!

 

Yes. Ray Gunn is coming to Albuquerque. My panties refuse to stay on. And he is also teaching a class this Saturday. This class is worth it if you are a seasoned performer or just getting started.

Ray_Gunn

You so want to take a class from this man. Guh!

And right after class, I’ll be zipping up to Colorado Springs, ( in my leopard print feetie jammies) to celebrate Holly Rebelle’s birthday.

hollyrebellebday

We are so ready to rage with Peaks and Pasties!

 

If you miss any of these events, I feel so sad for you.

Oh JEZUS!

Where do I begin? I guess with Colorado. I still haven’t recovered from it. I mean, I was there from Thursday to Monday and it just blew my mind.

I have absolutely no pictures of all the shenanigans that went on because I left my battery charger in a hotel on the east coast and I was having too much fun. And I am too damn tired to write out a whole post.

SOOOOOOOO, here’s what is coming up in the week!

Tallulah’s Birthday Suit Bonanza!!

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AHAHAH! I’ll be performing in Santa Fe for the first time this Saturday. I am so excited. I hope to give Tallulah a lap dance.  You got to come to this show. Seriously, check the line up:

Join Zircus Erotique and Special Guests in celebrating the birthday of Tallulah St. James!!
Featuring:
The Queen of the Fire Tassels, Satan’s Angel
Lola Spitfire
Bunny Bee
September Smith
Zircus Erotique:
Doutelle
Lady Lux
Lily La Dee
Madam Lennox
Mena Domina
Gilded Cage Burlesk:
IntoxiKate
Vivian MirAnn
Burque Burlesque:
Kiity Irreverent
Ri Ri Syncyr
Burlesque Noir:
General Blackery
Holly Rebelle
AND!!!
Boylesque from Colorado!!!
Mustang Monroe
Mr Valdez
Also, recent graduates from the ZE Burlesque Class
Isabella Bashir
Anouska
Songbird: Sofia Soubrette
Emcee: Naughty Pierre
www.zeburlesque.com

And don’t think the rock has stopped. OH NO! The one, the only Reigning Queen of Burlesque 2011 Miss Indigo Blue will be teaching in the Q on Tuesday July 26th. Your mind is blown I know. Check this out!

miss indigo blu

Reigning Queen of Burlesque, Miss Indigo Blue will be in Albuquerque for one night only sharing her wealth of information by teaching classes both open to public and private sessions available.
For more class descriptions and sign up please go to www.burlesquenoir.com/indi​goblue
6-7:30 Available for private sessions, please contact hollyrebelle@burlesquenoir​.com to reserve your slot!
7:30-8:30 The Art Of The Tease: Burlesque and Empowered Flirtation $20 ***open to the public***
8:30 – 9:30 Tassel Twirling for the Twenty-First Century $20 ***open to the public***
9:30 – 11:30 Private Sessions available please contact hollyrebelle@burlesquenoir​.com to reserve your slot.

Go ahead and get schooled!

I’ve already signed up for both of her classes and my titties are shaking with joy!

You wanna know what’s fun?

Reading the Albuquerque Craigslist personals for men seeking men and looking at the the dick pics that are posted with the ad. Damn! Who knew that there were so many bored and horny dudes in this town? I have enriched my life 10 fold by learning about blow and go’s , all the different angles in which to take pictures of your dick and how there is one dude who has a room at the Hyatt Tamya. HaaayyyyAAAA! Fuck my vagina, I’m going over anyway!

You wanna know what else is fun? Burlesque Noir Presents: Red Hot Burlesque Summer.  BAM! I think this is our first work safe flier.

burlesque noir 8w

You can and should buy your tickets in advance here. They are only $10 in advance. And where else can you see the amazing Kellita Maloof from San Francisco’s Hot Pink  Feathers but right here in the 505. DO NOT MISS THIS SHOW!

Super extra bonus! Kellita will be teaching workshops on WORLD CABARET/SAMBA DANCE TECHNIQUE and Crafting the Solo Friday night at Rythmic Arts Center (4821 Central Ave. NE). HERE is all the information and sign up form for the workshops.

We got new routines and costumes and gussied up some of our classics and made them bigger and better than ever so get your ass down to the Launchpad June 18th. Yes, you can wear a bikini. Yes, you can buy me a drink. Yes, you can send me dick pics.

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The Biggest Little Burly-Q Show In The Q

trixie and monkey

Trixie Little and Evil Hate Monkey are coming to perform in Albuquerque Wednesday April 27th. Let me repeat that.

Trixie Little and Evil Hate Monkey from NYC are performing here in Albuquerque Wednesday April 27th.

Is your mind not blown? Because mine is. These are two of the most amazing performers I have ever had the chance to meet and see live.  You will get to see this live:

Show Details!

Burlesque Noir Presents:
The Biggest Little Burly-Q Show in the Q
Starring:
Trixie Little and Evil Hate Monkey
…From NYC!
www.trixielittle.com
***
Featuring NM Performers:
Burlesque Noir
Kitty Irreverent
RiRi Syncyr
Miss Vivian MirAnn
Tallulah St. James
Mr. and Mrs. Rebelle
General Blackery
Ann Gora
Doutelle
Mena Domina
Lady Lux
IntoxiKate
Satyricon
With
MC Xavier Wyntir
DJ Brian Botkiller
Wednesday April 27th
At EFFEX Nightclub (100 5th Street Southwest Albuquerque, NM)
7:30 pm
$10 at the Door
21+

Do Not miss this once in a lifetime performance. Seriously, what else are you gonna do on a Wednesday night? What else can be that important? Fuck work. Come see some great live entertainment!