Like watching sausage getting made

     Before I start with the main subject of this post, I would just take a moment to talk about some people. I have spent a long time, too much time, talking about people I do not want to be around. I got to stop doing that because I am #blessed to be spending a lot of my time with people I want to be around. I have great roommates and friends that I hang with most times on the daily and I am doing well, thanks.

      • So you know the idiom about if you like sausages, don’t watch them get made? The idea being that if something is like watching sausage get made something unpleasant will be revealed. Well my friends, I have seen the sausage get made and worked in that factory and it is just as unpleasant and filled with animals guts as you think. I can be super candid and revealing but I will just leave it at that.
      • If we are not friends outside of Facebook, you do not message or comment on my page, why do we need to be friends on Facebook? Why does it matter if I am your friend or not? I do not have to like you, look at you, talk to you or be any sort of some type of way to you. Get over yourselves if you can’t handle being unfriended on Facebook. It’s unbecoming and unprofessional.
      • If you can’t talk to me in person, but have to go through someone else when talking about me, what makes you think I want to talk/deal with you in the first place?
      • I just have resting bitch face. And I hate everyone. *Shurgs*
      • Yes, there is a problem/rift in burlesque. Deal with it. It’s stupid here in Albuquerque. It’s stupid because cliques are stupid and that’s all this is ; a clique.
      • Yes, I have been very negative about burlesque. Those are my personal feelings. I am going to express them. If you still enjoy performing and the burlesque life, and your Glitter Tribe, good for you. Enjoy them and have a lot of fun.  As for me, I feel the exact opposite.
      • Part of me feels like I just drank the Kool-Aid in Jim Jones’ cult and now instead of reaching the Promised Land, I’m just a nameless, faceless cult victim who got caught up in the possibility of enlightenment.
      • I did not benefit from BHoF. I do not see it the way I used to, which was a step in the right direction or a boost up. No, BHoF is a good way to spend a lot of money and play the game of “lets dodge the sexual predator.”
      • I mean raise your hands if you’ve every been assulted at a show. It’s a real fucking treat. Just be sure to spit in their face and end with your tits out. 😉
      • But BLACKERY why are you still performing if you don’t like the scene? Well, where else can I perform? I’m a performer. I’m good at it. It’s what I do best. What else can I do? No matter the club, bar, stage, format, it will always be this. I’ve done recitals for dance, community theather. It’s all the same. 
      • But BLACKERY why don’t you do your own show or form your own burlesque troupe? Fuck no! The last thing this place needs is another burlesque troupe or performer collective because that’s gonna make it better. *eye roll* I don’t know what would help. Oh wait, yes I do! $18 million bucks and my own theater would help.
      • If there is no friendship in show business, then I do not see the reason why I have to be “friends” with everyone.
      • If you want to see me perform, you can pay me to be at your show. You have to pay me more than $20-35-$50. I am worth so much more than that. A lot of performers are worth more than that. If you want great entertainers at your show, you will pay them as such. If you want consistently great audiences, and filled seats, you will pay your performers what they are worth.
    • To those that are afraid of me and think I’m a mean bitch, BOO!
    • To those that don’t give a shit,  BYE!
    • To those that are upset, weep not little one. There is more to be miserable about in the world.

Comments, questions and hatemail  can be emailed to generalblackery@gmail.com

XOXOX

 

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Post-Coital

Good mother-fucking afternoon everyone!

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I’m going to hot yoga this afternoon. This will be my first time. If I die, this will be the last image of myself. Amazing.

Well, the Tucson show has come and gone and so has the Southwest Burlesque Showcase. Can I just say how amazing last week’s three day extravaganza was?  I mean that shit was crazy fun. I had a blast hanging out with old friends, new friends and even a bear! Next year I’m definitely not going to work those days because I missed a huge opportunity hanging out with my NM, CO, IL, TN and TX buddies. Next time fo’ sheezy. Once I get all the pictures and video!!! back I will do a HUGE post on all the awesome. In the meantime, here’s some emotional vomit. Don’t worry, I’ll have a prize at the bottom.

 

I got a major case of the burlesque hangover/comedown and a COLD! And I’m doing my taxes and this year I have to OWE! I feel like I have just fucked myself over and it’s only the middle of February( I am the master of shitting where I eat and shooting myself in the foot). Well I guess it’s better to be fucked over by yourself than be fucked over by someone else. Right right? Unless it’s by one of these hot bitches. Mmmmm. (see what I did there?)

clockworkwhore2

I had myself a nice cry Monday night while eating pho and watching Harold and Maude and realizing that damn, I need a Maude. I want to be Maude. Can someone please caress me the way  Harold caresses and strokes the wooden statue? Fuuuuuuuucccckkkkkkkk. I try not to give a fuck, but do you know how much energy and stress that takes? GOD DAMN!

buddha

I knew after all the shows I wanted to go on a “chemical vacation”. Meaning any drugs and alcohol that is available can get in my body right now. Well those chemicals have been nothing but Emergen-C, Airborne, vitamins vitamins vitamins and some whiskey. My snot is electric yellow. It won’t stop. I really wanted to treat myself to a tattoo for Valentine’s Day because I love only myself but I don’t think it’s a good idea to get inked while sniffling. Hopefully soon.

Blah.

 

Here’s your bonus if you haven’t seen it yet.

bringonthemen

Much love to Phoenix Rizing Photography for this kickass shot! The got a lot more from the show on their page. Check it yo!

Where am I?

I’m sitting on the couch right now. But, if you are in need of some Blackery and you see I haven’t updated, never fret. I am on the net. Somewhere.
Find me at the following places were I am probably bitching about how I can’t afford a flight to France or some fucked up shit.

I’m sure there will be more.

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  • Because I have personality issues and love to sign up for stuff,  like whoa, I got a blog over a WordPress.com.   Once hosting and all those good things are settled it is the generalblackery.com site.  I have plans for this one. Plans that I will actually carry out. (Shocking I know)
  • As you know,Paul and I are moving. Again.  Moving in a couple of days actually. To where, we don’t know yet. We don’t know if we will be storing our stuff in another house or buy a storage unit. Until then, we really need to pack and get ready for Maryland.
  • I have been reading Wishcraft by Barbra Sher. It’s supposed to help you get what you really want. I hope so. I need all the help I can get. So far, I like it because it’s not all hippy-dippy only think positive and be positive and blah blah blah. It actually recommends negative thinking! My specialty. It’s also a lot better than What Color is Your Parachute.
  • On the hooping front, here is a video of my progress. ETA: Fuck the video. Loading on Youtube. This could take a while.

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Virgil being adorable on the couch.

DSC04025 Ain’t my blog post unless I post a vanity picture.

Stalled

Oh dear. When I started this blog a few months back I had intentions of doing interviews, video how-tos, tips and tricks and a whole bunch of stuff.  That kinda hasn’t happened  unfortunately. The Burlesque Noir video is half way edited and was supposed to be done in May before the Greatest Tits show. But well, Paul ( who is a fantastic editor) got really busy. I suck at editing. So, it sits unfinished. I hope it gets finished.

I had LOTS of ideas in April. Right before I quit I knew the direction I wanted to go in. Now that direction has gone somewhere and I have no clue where it’s going. It’s organic. I’m gonna let it evolve to where it needs and wants to go.

Other things have gotten in the way.  I know I’m not alone when you decide to move it pretty much consumes a lot of your time and energy. After this month is over I hope to get back to creation and getting off of my ass and lining up some performances.

I really want and need to perform. I really need to get to work on that. I’m so much better at performing than I am at working.

I feel like Starbuck. I’m only good at one thing. Other things I frak up. 

But, we are both badass. kara thrace

So, never fear. I will get this more off the ground so next, I will never work for anybody else but myself. Working for someone else is for suckers.

Hey Sarebear!

wazupbishes

 

Whatcha been up to?

  • Packing! I’m moving out of my apartment and becoming a gypsy. I really hate sorting through all the little stuff and trying to decide if I want to keep it or not. I’m really trying to stick with the “ get rid of 80 to 90% of my belongings” thing. I’m sure I will. Yard sale Saturday the 25th! Bring cash and buy my stuff.
  • Hooping. Now that I’m out of work and not in Roswell, I can go to Bataan park on Sundays and hoop my ass off. I can also hoop my ass off in Paul’s room. I can also hoop in other parks. I am DETERMINED to get chest/shoulder hooping down pat. None of this wonky business. I want to be a hooping master by the end of the year.
  • I’m irritable. Like WhOA! Since I got laid off, I didn’t have enough money for my auto-ship of Xocai chocolate and rent, so the chocolate had to go (thanks to all the people who didn’t sign up, much love). That was the beginning of the month and I am feeling the effects. I’ve got some fantastically huge zits on my face and bloat like dead animal in the desert. Ugh. And being frustrated with hooping and poi tricks isn’t helping. 
  • Job hunting. Ugh. Don’t want to but I need to eat and I would like a pair of Melodia’s. Anybody know of any work I could do for about 2 months? star-wars-unemployment
  • I’ve been spending a lot of my time naked. It’s just too dang hot to put on clothes.

What’s up with you?